“I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself.”
I am a man obsessed with nostalgia.
People. Memories. Things. I cling to all of them, never wanting anyone or anything I care about to be sucked up in the void I call The Happenings of Life. The tragic element to being someone obsessed with nostalgia is that, regardless, I know that I’m going to lose most—if not all—of the things I cling to. When I graduated high school, the friends and memories I’d coveted over my childhood had reached that inevitable moment; all of my friends were going to go off and start their lives, wherever the road took them. I knew that moment was coming, knew that I would not have the same relationships with these people that I at one point did. And even knowing, it still bothers me to this day.
People grow and change. Things become lost or destroyed. Memories tend to fade over time. I am obsessed with wanting those moments and feelings to be eternal and I’m working on accepting the fact that that isn’t possible. Nothing lasts forever. Now, the point about this, dear reader, is how crucial all of these things were to finding my path in life. Of course, I’m still trying to figure all of this shit out, and I likely always will be, but these experiences are shaping and cultivating me into the person I want to become.
Life is scary and wild and exciting and beautiful, and trying to navigate it can seem daunting and downright impossible. But what I’ve learned so far is that there are a few things you can practice that’ll help guide you into figuring things out a bit more.
For starters, be true to yourself. This sounds cliché, but it’s one of the more important aspects. Be honest with yourself about everything in your life. Your situations, your relationships with the people around you, with your feelings. Honesty is the best foundation for really figuring out who you are and what makes you who you are, as well as makes you more aware of what you really want in life. I know it’s easier said than done, but if you’re real with yourself, you’ll be well on your way to living your truth.
Explore your passions. Find the things that make you happy, maybe a hobby you enjoy doing. For me, a few would be writing and reading. If you enjoy creating art, create more of it! Learn about your favorite things as in-depth as you can. Absorb all the knowledge. You may find certain avenues (like a future career) within those passions, as well as other passions you had no idea about!
Don’t be afraid to take care of yourself. Now, this one is a tough one because I know how difficult it can be do this. I have bad anxiety, and so my brain can be a very mean organ sometimes. But I want to stress the importance of taking care of yourself, physically, mentally, spiritually, etc. Don’t be afraid to take a mental health day if needed. Don’t be afraid to step away/get away from situations that are not in your best interest. Do the things that make you happy (as long as they are not hurting you or someone else). By understanding your needs and what you like and don’t like, you’ll have a better grasp of what you want in your life.
Break out of your comfort zone. Another hard one, especially for someone like me who is quite content with the comfortable boundaries I’m in. I’m currently in a new living situation with roommates I have yet to meet, and while it’s definitely scary, I know that it’ll be a good experience for me to have. It can absolutely be a scary things to step out of your comfort zone, but who knows what experiences you could have or the people you can meet if you took the chance? Try and do the things that scare you, and you may find that they weren’t all that scary afterwards.
And my last bit of advice is to love yourself. This may sound odd, but if you don’t love who you are, every facet, then everything is going to be exceptionally difficult. I want to emphasize how important, how beautiful, how amazing each and every one of you are. You all have amazing qualities, and once you realize just how powerful and fantastic you are, you will gain so much clarity on what you want out of life. You won’t settle. Knowing your worth is the most important thing along with loving yourself. So try and stop with any self-deprecation and start loving yourself for who you are.
Of course, all of these pieces of advice may sound very superficial and make you say, “well, duh” but they’re still very important to practice. It’s also crucial to remember that life is crazy and that, even if you did all of those things, it may take some time before you begin to realize where you want to go and what you want to do. What’s great about practicing those elements is that it will align you and help put you in the right mindset to figure yourself out a bit more.
I wish you all a happy, prosperous 2020!
If you want to check out my novel NEON BLUE, here’s the Amazon link:
I’m also on Instagram and Twitter: @jordanadams1128